art shows, wild drives

raining like a typhoon, frogs leaping in the road everywhere I looked- I went to Eugene and got back late tonight.

My car has two full galleries’s worth of art in it.

I had another bird guest, too. I’ll be posting photos of all the goodies I just picked up tomorrow!
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birthday!

flamingo artwork, paintingI am having an amazing birthday time!

(I made this happy flamingo art yesterday. it’s prismacolor and watercolor on arches hotpress.)

my cat died today.

So I won’t post anything but this.

He was a good sport.

 

RIP oskarbro.

making art, making life.

The world is a very grey and dismal place at times. There are deaths, horrors. We are all alone in these little bodies, floating around, disconnected most of the time- from each other and from the ground we stand on. Most people DO live quietly, desperately, working and thinking and amassing a thousand new worries each day.

Most people walk around afraid, nervous. Or angry. Or just focused on the task at hand, which for more people all the time involves merely surviving the vicissitudes of economy and thrift, of bad jobs or no work. Of struggle. Life is mostly struggle and concern for most people on earth, and for the rest it can be even worse.

It’s our job, as artists, to show people that there is more. I am not a religious person, nor even a spiritual one. I do not believe that there is a sky-man or any kind of conscious entity watching over us carefully, or interested in our problems. I do not believe. BUT- I do believe that the world itself is a being of grace, and by truly seeing it, and being within it, we can lighten our weight. This entails details.

When one is in a chain gang, there will be a beautiful weed sprouting in the ditch. When one has lost hope and is starving, there will be the smell of dry morning air, and the sunrise. When the worries about the future become too much, there is still the present.

I know this doesn’t make up for any of it. I also know that there are times for all of us when we realize our solitude, when we are alone and in pain, in the dark. Cold and possibly hopeless. In those times it is art’s job to expose the alternatives, to bring the world into us and that way bring us out of ourselves.

Art doesn’t have to be “good” or skilled or perfect or even beautiful to do this. It will be a different view for each artist and a different piece that speaks to each viewer. Sometimes the crude and the ugly do this much more effectively than the pretty and the sweet- actually for me, when I am alone and in pain in the dark, it is the reminder that others have been there as well that helps. And art that speaks this way is often NOT beautiful to look at.

nude watercolor painting, naked smileI need to sell art to live- to pay rent. To eat. If I could give it away and not be homeless I would. But the necessities of the world insist that my work must be valued at a number. I know that for some the value of their work is low and their hours are long and hard; that they must do work which is difficult, upsetting, dangerous. I am lucky to be an artist, I am privileged in ways not many are. I love my work. That alone is a stroke of fortune.

People who hate their work but must do it deserve my best efforts, because I know that at times my work, seeing my work and interacting with it, is their release and their reminder. Artists have an obligation to try their damnedest to do that, and to do it as best they can every time.

goners

I really, really miss my friend Brad.

my daily routine.

 

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I have two separate routines for work. it depends whether I am having a tattoo-studio day or a home-studio day.

if I’m working at the shop, I wake around ten or eleven and lay around like a slug until it’s time to rush to work. I arrive, drink coffee, plan out my hours. talk to clients. clean my inks off or monkey with a machine until  “real work” shows up. I leave right after the shop closes for the day. I usually don’t do any other art on these days; working on commission is draining (satisfying though!)

if I’m not going in to the shop, I wake up late, noon or one. I have coffee and laze around a little.then eat, and start looking over the mess I left the previous day. usually I will have something drying and ready to be worked over a little more. so I pick up where I left off. at some point I’ll reach a moment where everything is tacky. then I start something new…I work a little, stop and stare. smoke, have a sandwich and more coffee.

a lot of times I’ll just get in the car and go exploring, searching for objects or supplies, detritus. things that make me feel creative. it’s a lot of walking along the river or the side of the road.

I work until very late at night when I’m doing my own art. I’ll stay up until the birds are talking. sometimes I work all night and into the next day. coffee is my friend. this happens a lot more in the winter. I tend to have a very hard time waking up in the mornings, it’s always been that way.

of course I spend about two months each year  “on the road”; I can’t call it a vacation because I usually am tattooing just about that whole time- I don’t like not working anyway. but when I travel I have no routine at all, and when I return it takes me a while to get back in rhythm with my schedules and routines at home.

corneal abrasions

everywhere it’s glowing was scraped up. the doctor said “like steel wool, some of the worst corneal abrasions I’vve seen.”

I’m already feeling much better, apparently eyes heal quickly. I’m down for a few days though, til they heal up.

The ER here in Phoenix took good care of me- I hate doctors but the one I had for this was really good. So unusual for me to get a doctor (esp at the ER) that does just the right thing,

And the irony is that I never saw her- I was blinded-and have no idea what she looked like.

ETA: They gave me antibiotic ointment goo which sucks and makes my eyes stick shut. they told me no drops- but today I’ve been using plain saline eyedrops and it is helping a lot. also told me no ice packs but until I used one yesterday my eyes were so swollen I couldn’t open them- I’ve been using ice packs anyway because it’s helping.

I sometimes wonder if hospital staff don’t recommend anything that reduces pain, when I come in, just to be dicks. Or because they just don’t care about the pain level? I mean they did give me some percocet but that just makes me calmer- the pain stays the same. Topical stuff is making more difference than that did.

I can read and write today and keep my eyes open longer than yesterday. So, NOT following instructions has helped way more than following them.

bi winning tattoo

tiger blood winning tattoo

Honestly, if you’re an incredibly rich and talented weirdo, why the fuck SHOULD you fight being manic? Hell, ride it as far as you can.

There are millions of people who have to work normal jobs or take care of kids or whathaveya, that are vicariously living through Charlie Sheen. Yeah, he’s probably bipolar. So? I mean…

Stability is a great thing, don’t get me wrong. But if you don’t actually HAVE TO be stable to survive, then why the fuck would you turn down mania or hypomania? Those mental states are rich in inspiration and productive as fuck.

If he has to eventually deal with a crash-he has the resources to do it.

If he loses his job- he can do other work. So…fuck yeah Mr. Sheen. Ride it out.

Guesting and the road

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Just got back from phoenix. I love my desert tribe. Thinking I’ll visit Spokane next. Anyone up there got a chair to fill?

pew pew

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