Posted by resonanteye on 03/26/2013
I haven’t smoked in two days, and I’ve smoked a single pack of cigarettes in the past week. I finally got good gear for PV/ecig use, so I haven’t felt the urge to smoke.
I can also see this becoming an all-consuming side hobby for me. I made these little desk-props for my pvs today out of polyclay. I plan to paint them (one’s a dick, one’s tits, and one is an eye)…maybe I’ll make a few more too, that are a little more interesting or fleshed-out.
Posted in !!!~pictures~!!!, brag, DIY, geek, health and safety, personal, true stories | Tagged: crafty bitch, e-cigarette, ecig, personal vaporizer, poly clay, PV, quit smoking | 9 Comments »
Posted by resonanteye on 08/01/2012
How to clean animal remains you find that still have a bit of meat on them:
Wear disposable gloves.
TEAL DEER:
DON’T FUCKING BOIL OR BLEACH BONES! IT DESTROYS THEM!
How to disinfect feathers (legal ones- domestic and game birds)
Wear disposable gloves.
TEAL DEER? MOST FEATHERS ARE ILLEGAL, DON’T BE A DUMBASS.
Posted in !!!~pictures~!!!, !!!~posts with lists in them~!!!, art, caveman art, DIY, health and safety, how-to, morbid art, oregon living, questions, step by step, taxidermy | Leave a Comment »
Posted by resonanteye on 06/24/2012
Mary Cecil voluntarily committed herself to an institution in the early 1950s. This account was published in its entirety in Encounter, in 1956. Again, the article is excerpted from the book “The Inner World of Mental Illness”.
(for other excerpts, see here, or here)
After a fortnight in a sort of reception ward in the mental hospital, I complained to the doctor that nothing was being done. They didn’t appear to appreciate the urgency of the position. There was I, helpless in the hands of a fiend from Hell and anything might happen any minute. (Ms. Cecil believes that a hallucinated voice is the Devil, sent to harass her.) The Hospital ambled through its days, sweeping us off to Occupational Therapy or out to grass, as the mood took it. One might be suddenly singled out and, eager with hope, be subjected to a blood test or some flippancy like that.
“Ah, but we’re doing so much for you,” the doctor said earnestly…”In fact,” the doctor continued fatly, “we’re going to give you some injections. You’ll be moved to another ward.”
I’d learned already that it was a waste of time asking questions. Psychiatrists thrive on their air of mystery. Anyway, the fact of strange surroundings was enough. In this ward there had been some outbursts from explosive patients. …I noticed that the more obstreperous patients were dragged off, protesting violently, to some outer dungeon spoken of in whispers as the Villa. I added that to my fears and redoubled my attempts to appear totally harmless.
She discusses insulin treatment she received after being transferred to the next ward- a treatment used commonly at that time.
After tea I saw a lady doctor who said I was to have some injections. I saw myself ablaze with vitamins in next to no time. At bedtime the men disappeared into one dormitory and we women into another, so that was all right. Just as I was getting into bed I noticed a sheet marked the Villa. There was a curious taste in my mouth, had I been tricked into the place? Heart thudding, I gazed out the window and saw a small building by itself. “That’s the Villa,” breathed the woman in the next bed.
Posted in deep thoughts, ethics, health and safety, learning, true stories | Tagged: excerpts, experiences, madness, mental health, mental hospitals, mental illness, the good old days, vintage medicine | 2 Comments »
Posted by resonanteye on 06/22/2012
This, and the previous excerpt I posted, are small selections from the book “The Inner World of Mental Illness”, published by Harper & Row in 1964. It’s one of my favorite books, written by a variety of people in very different circumstances and with very different afflictions; all the stories have the same undertone of fear, grieving, and pragmatism.
I’ve read this book to shreds, literally.
Most of the chapters in it are excerpts from longer books written by the mentally ill, but some are merely short pieces, collected by doctors or nurses. I’ll post more of these if enough of you want more of them.
The book includes a variety of mental illnesses, so if you’d like an excerpt dealing with some other disorder, let me know in the comments and I’ll do my best.
This excerpt is from “I am crazy wild this minute”, written by Lara Jefferson in the 40s. It was written on scrap paper and wrapping paper in a state hospital.
When her writing was discovered by staff, she was given a typewriter and encouraged to continue. Hospitals at that time were much more chaotic, and psychosis was not treated with as much compassion or medical understanding as it is today.
Had I been born in the age and time when the world dealt in a straightforward manner with misfits as could not meet the requirements of living, I would not have been much of a problem to my contemporaries. They would have said that I was “Possessed of the Devil” and promptly stoned me to death- or else disposed of me in some other equally effective manner.
…
I know I cannot think straight- but the conclusions I arrive at are very convincing to me and I still think the whole system is a regular Hades itself. …I cannot conduct myself as the rules set forth because something has broken loose within me and I am insane- and differ from these others to the extent that I still have sense enough to know it; which is a mark of spectacular intelligence- so they tell me.
Here I sit- mad as the hatter- with nothing to do but either become madder and madder- or else recover enough of my sanity to be allowed to go back to the life which drove me mad.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted in !!!~pictures~!!!, !!!~posts with links in them~!!!, authors, deep thoughts, health and safety, interview with the artist, personal, true stories | Tagged: antique medicine, delusions, excerpt, madness, mental health in the 40s, mental illness, mentally ill, schizophrenia | 8 Comments »
Posted by resonanteye on 06/18/2012
Thought I’d join in on a twitter thing I saw, and post my daily dose of medicines.
In the morning, I take the top row of pills, all of them, everyday.
That’s two 200mg seroquel, and two 40mg prozac capsules. And to the right, Chantix.
I take this as soon as I open my eyes. Sometimes (almost always) I stay in bed or maybe even go back to sleep for a bit; but it’s the first thing I do in the morning.
At night, I take one of the leftmost pills on the bottom row- I alternate them. One is lunesta, one is ambien, one is temazepam. I take a different one each night so they all keep working. And, along with that, I take my second chantix.
I’ve had insomnia as long as I can remember. The last year or so with these medicines, I have been able to fall asleep far easier and more consistently than ever before. Not that I don’t still sleep in, because I do. But at least I don’t stay up all night then sleep an hour or two- or sleep ALL day everyday.
Also, I’ve been smoking a pack a day every day for 28 years. I’ve gone through one pack in the last two days…so the chantix is helping. I still don’t know if it will work, if I will be able to quit completely, yet- but I am hopeful.
Posted in !!!~pictures~!!!, deep thoughts, health and safety, interview with the artist, personal | Tagged: chantix, crazy pills, delicious western medicine, medicine, pills, seroquel, smoking | 3 Comments »
Posted by resonanteye on 05/30/2012
In my previous post, I told you guys that I am a legal, humane cannibal. I’ve had a lot of people asking me questions about that, so I figured I would answer some here in the blog, in case others were wondering.
I have drawn and painted portraits of many cannibals. I find it fascinating that this taboo is so strong, and somewhat confusing- our taboo against murder is less strong than this. (In western society)
Q:Why?
A: It started as an in-joke among a few of my friends and I. I was watching the movie “Alive”, and complaining throughout the documentary attached to the DVD that they not once asked them about the taste.
Then a friend had a section of thigh muscle removed, and brought it to me, frozen, as a challenge. “You want to find out, go ahead and find out,” he said. So- I did. I cooked it and ate it.
Someone else brought me their removed earlobes. I cooked and ate them.
Then, I sat in on a friend getting skin removal done (scarification). she bagged up this hunk of her skin and handed it to me.
This happened a few more times, and as of now I have had six or so people give me bits of themselves to eat. It was mainly curiosity at first, and still is. I wanted to know if it would change me, make me a wendigo, give me laughing sickness, make me strong, or just be…meat like any other meat.
Q: didn’t you get grossed out?
A: Yeah, the first time was weird. Right before I took the first bite I felt freaked out. Nervous and kind of grossed out.
I sort of forced myself to think “pork chop” and took that bite, and then after that it was easy.
Q: You’re a cannibal.
A: You didn’t ask a question.
Q: Isn’t that illegal?
A: No. Nobody was harmed. I did not do surgery on anyone; their flesh is theirs to do what they want with. None of this was done illegally in any way, nor is any of it inhumane. Actually, it’s the closest you could probably get to ethically-sourced meat. The source being capable of consent, alive, and willing.
Q: What about diseases? KURU. Mad cow!
A: I have never eaten brains or spinal tissue. And everything I’ve eaten has been thoroughly cooked.
Q: But…WHY?
A: I had to know. I had the opportunity to try something that would not harm anyone, and so I decided that life is short and I should try anything I can that is not going to harm someone. So, I did. I also feel like it’s a very rare opportunity, and that not taking it was somehow the wrong thing to do.
If you guys have other questions, that’s what the comment section is for. I don’t mind answering whatever I can.
Posted in deep thoughts, ethics, health and safety, interview with the artist, morbid art, personal, politics, questions, true stories, you | Tagged: cannibal, ethical diet, human meat, humane meat, legal cannibalism | 7 Comments »
